A Letter, Part Three: THIS TIME IT IS A LITTLE DESPERATE AND WILL MAKE YOU UNCOMFORTABLE, PROBABLY

Dear Body,

I totally don’t need you to have lost weight over the last two weeks. Isn’t that convenient and nice of me? All I am asking is that you stayed exactly the same. Isn’t that easy?! It is the easiest thing in the world! Didn’t you enjoy eating 1,900 calories a day? I know, it was dreamy, right? Wouldn’t you hate to have to cut back? I know, that would totally suck. But, if you gain weight … well … I can’t guarantee anything.

But, that’s not even going to be an issue, right, ’cause you’re totally going to weigh exactly the same as you were two weeks ago, right? I have faith in you, body! Seriously, though, I just want some peace of mind and to be able to go into the summer knowing how much I need to eat to maintain my weight AND NOT HAVING TO TINKER WITH NUMBERS I HATE MATH AND GAINING WEIGHT AND OBSESSING ABOUT THINGS SO MAINTAIN, OR ELSE, A’IGHT?!

Love,

Elizabeth

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