Cemetery Blues

I enjoy my job at the cemetery. No, really! When I get up in the morning and say, “UGH BLERGH WORK,” it is just my horribly whiny knee-jerk reaction to the idea that I have to do something besides sit on my ass that day. And, when I get a phone call saying, “Nope, there hasn’t been any rain so the grass isn’t growing so there isn’t any work,” I’m reminded of the fact that I really need to shut my mouth, get rid of the negativity and just be grateful for the fact that I do have work. Oh, and just in case you’re wondering, I’m waxing reflective because I did get such a phone call this morning.

Yep … in light of this, I do realize that I really need to stop talking myself out of things/being so negative about work, social happenings,* things I have to do, etc. Honestly, I think I would enjoy my life a lot more if I just put a stop to mentally building everything up into a huge chore, because 90% I get to work/go to an event I was dreading and find myself saying, “Oh! This isn’t so bad.”

Anyway, with my surprise week off from work (which hopefully won’t turn into a two-weeks off from work) I’ve decided to catch up on my summer reading. Here’s what my “reading log” for the near future looks like:

1. Day After Night, Anita Diamant (I’m currently working on this, and I’m not sure how I feel about it, yet; when I went to a speaking-event featuring Diamant, she described the novel as being an introduction to the history of Israel and that it was for people who didn’t know very much about the nation’s origins. And yet, I feel that you kind of need some background in WWII/Palestine’s history to have a full understanding of the book.)

2. The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, Stieg Larsson (Everyone and their brother is talking about it, so I guess I’ll read it. Stop judging me.)

3. Love in the Time of Cholera, Gabriel Garcia Marquez (I love Marquez’s style of writing and his inclusion of magical elements in a realistic setting, so I think it’s about time I read what is probably his best known work.)

4. Wolf Hall, Hilary Mantel (I’ve actually had this book lying around for months, but since I bought it while I was still up at school and thus tied up with required reading, I never got around to reading it. Mmm, historical fiction focusing on the Tudors. I love them, don’t you? I don’t know why, but I’ve always been vaguely obsessed with Henry VIII and his unfortunate wives.)

I don’t know why, but I really enjoy planning out what I’m going to read next; it’s like, “Haha! Look at how intellectual my future is going to be! Suck it, stupidity!”

In other news, I went to the gym twice today, but I only made the second venture because I desperately needed to get out of the house (I enjoy my days off, but I hate being idle for extended periods of time; I feel like if I haven’t earned my time off, I can’t enjoy it) and also because I needed to burn off some PMS-anxiety (For some reason, I always get super anxious around my lady times. Right now, I’m obsessing about the prospect of not having work once my season cemetery job ends in September). Also, if I didn’t get out the house, I was definitely going to eat 100% of everything.

Do you have any bad “mental habits?” What are you reading at the moment?

* Yeah, most people probably find these enjoyable, but I’ve developed some kind of social anxiety, as I’ve mentioned before. Honestly, I worry a bit about myself; I can’t seem to get out of my own way to get out and do social things. Part of me says, “Well, what’s there really to do, anyway? Most people your age go to bars for social interaction, and you don’t drink!” But, on the other hand, I feel like I’m just making excuses for my anti-social behavior. WHAT’S A TEETOTALING┬áLADY TO DO?!?

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2 Comments

  1. July 9, 2010 at 3:50 PM

    “I think I would enjoy my life a lot more if I just put a stop to mentally building everything up into a huge chore”

    I do this ALL the time, especially with social events. I have all these bridal showers coming up for cousins and friends and such (along with their weddings too) and I’m stressing out about them because… I don’t know, because they really do seem like chores, and I just don’t want to socialize. And then the REST of my life gets all stressy – “I have to go to this event during the afternoon on saturday and that means my entire weekend is just ruined, ugh, when will I ever get a full weekend where I just don’t have to do ANYTHING?” and it’s like, allison, it’s one afternoon, chill.

    Also, Girl with the Dragon Tattoo is good! But people keep seeming to think that it’s like, high literature, when really it’s just entertainment. But that’s just my opinion.

  2. Allison said,

    July 9, 2010 at 3:51 PM

    Ugh, why does my “balanceinbites” link go to a website that I never did anything with? I need to fix that.


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